Daphne - Sad News

A week or so ago, I mentioned Daphne in a post called - These are a Few of my Favorite Things.  I was reporting about an ear infection she was fighting, and of course that wasn’t one of my favorite things.  But Daphne IS.  I love her.  So much.  Many of you are familiar with Daphne’s story.  When Older Daughter rescued her, she had a severe leg wound.  That’s never good.  Those deep flesh wounds are the primary way FIV is transmitted from cat to cat.  And sure enough - Daphne is FIV+.  We nursed her back to health, she was eventually spayed, and she moved to a cage in the cathouse. I put out special pleas for a home.  I checked into special shelters that take FIV+ cats.  But Daphne didn’t get adopted, and no rescue offered to take her.  As I continued to get information from some of you about even more shelters that took cats like Daphne, I started wondering if I could make it work here.  I truly didn’t want Daphne to move on.  She is completely blind in one eye, and we discovered that she is almost entirely deaf.  I really didn’t want her to have to live in a shelter environment.  She is also completely in love with me.  She STILL rides around on me like a baby koala bear, hanging on and purring.  I started having Daphne OUT of her cage every minute that I was in the cathouse.  And then, when my girls both started making their plans to move out in 2012, I realized that Daphne could move into our home if a another home didn’t present itself.

I first suspected an ear infection because of an odor coming from the ear.  The first try was with an antibiotic ointment for the ear which also included an anti-inflammatory.  Daphne moved to my kennel office so I could keep an eye on her and make sure the drops were administered every 12 hours.  Two weeks with this treatment gained us no improvement.  Back to the vet for a high-powered antibiotic drop for that ear.  But Daphne’s condition did NOT clear up.  In fact, the odor was getting worse, and she was starting to be off-balance when she ran or jumped. 

Then last Friday, it scared me when I found a hard knot under that ear.  I called and got in.  We saw a different vet who said the hard spot was crystalized cartilage.  I worried that it could be a tumor, but he felt reasonably sure it was the cartilage thing.  I explained about the being off-balance which he said comes naturally with an ear infection.  The last couple of days, however, Daphne hasn’t wanted to walk towards me.  She stands and wobbles and waits for me to pick her up.  Then yesterday, I noticed Daphne seemed to be having a little bit of difficulty swallowing.  As I was administering her ear drops, I felt around on the knot.  It felt bigger.  And what really worried me was that it seemed to now stretch down onto the side of her throat.  I called and got her in.

The news wasn’t good.  The diagnosis is an inoperable, fast-growing tumor attached to the ear canal.  She has every symptom.  It wasn’t one of those moments when I felt the room start to spin because all day yesterday I was already thinking this was a tumor.  But I did feel the crushing disappointment that comes with getting news that has no hope in it.  Dr. A and I discussed the place we found ourselves in.  The tumor was growing fast.  It was blocking access to the deeper part of the ear.  This was the reason the ear infection wasn’t going away - the drops couldn’t reach the infection.  Daphne was off-balance as a result of the ear infection, but also because the mass was pressing on the inner ear.  Now the tumor had reached a place where it was encroaching on the larynx and esophagus.  It was only a matter of time - very short time - before the tumor would cut off Daphne’s airway or her ability to swallow food. 

I asked Dr. A if I would see rapid decline.  She said she thought so.  I told her that Daphne still eats and purrs like crazy when I hold her.  Dr. A said - Look Chrystal, I know you well enough to know that I had better try EVERYTHING before we opt for euthanization.  You would never forgive yourself or me if you were left with any doubts.  So I’m going to give Daphne a massive injection of antibiotic and steroid.   If we can clear up some of the infection, or if the steroid can shrink the mass a tiny bit, we might be buying Daphne a small amount of time.  It will give you time to adjust and might relieve some of Daphne’s current discomfort.  But I really think we could be talking only DAYS here.   I stood there wondering if I was hanging on for me or for Daphne.  It was for me.  Daphne cannot get better.  The tumor is highly aggressive and will only continue to press in.  But I had not had time to make sure Daphne knows how much I love her.  She was still eating and purring.  And she was not struggling to breathe.  Dr. A said the injections would give her a little relief, or they would not.  If she went downhill fast, I could call as soon as I knew it was time.  But any way you look at this, we aren’t left with much . . . 

Driving home from the vet, I put in a Christmas CD.  I thought about Daphne and her horrible start in life.  I thought about the hopes I’d had for her.  I thought about those of you who would be reading this sad news.  It’s Christmastime.  I wondered if I should maybe NOT share this to keep from bringing all of you down with me.  But over and over again, you have assured me that this is the reality of Life, and that you are in it with me.  When I sat down to type this post, I was SO glad to have a place to tell this story.  SO glad to have a place to share my thoughts and my pain.  SO glad to have a place to honor Daphne - a place where people would care so very much about her.  Daphne  deserves to have her story told.  Her life matters.  She is a little being.  Loved.  We'll take whatever time we have left, and cherish it.

                                    Daphne, sometimes called "Daffy Doodles", part koala bear.

 

 

Comments

[Random Felines]

OMG - I am heartbroken.....there aren't enough tears in the world to explain how I am feeling now. Please know that I am thinking of all of you....and I know you will give her all the love and time she needs. god this sucks..... give her extra kisses from me....

[Fuzzy Tales]

Oh, Chrystal, such sad news. I have trust and faith that you will let her go before she starts to suffer, before she can't swallow/eat. That you won't wait too long, for your own sake and not hers. I'm sorry it's only days, at best.

Sending her universal Light and love--and to you too--and wishing her godspeed on her Journey.

[Connie]

I am crying with you. I hope you have some wonderful quality time to share before that time comes. May you find a Christmas Miracle.

[Pam and the Califurrrrrnia5]

tears, tears, tears ... it reminds me so much of my sweet little Pepper who I lost seven years ago this month and is honored on the brick walkway. I know your love for this girl makes it hurt so much, but once again you have changed a life for the better.

[The Poupounette Gang]

In all of this sadness, Daphne knows love, and caring, and warmth. Her life may be a lot shorter than we had all hoped but it will have known love. That is what counts in the end.

[Lana]

Oh Chrystal I just can't even say anything right now. Crap. Kiss her for me, k? I'm very heartbroken right now.

[Mary Wiesner]

Not Daphne! I've loved her since you first took her in and told her story. Daphne is fortunate to have been taken in by you. At least with you she received tons of love and attention! Her life may prove to be short, but at least she knew love during her time with you. Please give her a big kiss and cuddle from me as well.

[Andrea & the Celestial Kitties]

I had been so hoping and praying that Daphne would find a forever home. Guess she already had one with you. I'm so so very sorry that it's such a short time, but I'm so so very glad she has you to koala with while she's here. Sending you prayers purrs and virtual hugs.

[Margaret Elmendorf]

Oh Chrystal, we are so sorry about Daphne. That is so sad but we know she has had so much love from you and your family. We are glad you are going to have a little time with her. We are just glad she had such a good life with you. We are sending tons of purrs and hugs. Take care.

[Kerry]

So sad for her -- and you. And like others, I know you will let her go after filling her with love. Sending all positive thoughts to you both.

[Webbthistle]

Yes, Andrea is right: beautiful Daphne has found her forever home with you. You are such a blessing in her life, as I know you feel she is a blessing to you. Treasure these days, Chrystal - they are so very precious. Hugs to you and kisses to lovely Daphne!

[Abby]

Chrystal
It's not the amount of time that matters, what matters is what was made with that time, and in that time there was a great deal of love to be had. You see Daphne was meant to be with you, and no one else. As hard as it will be and as sad and unexplainable as it is, I am glad she is there with you and knowing your love and your care. I am so sorry she has to go OTRB but she mattered and she knew that.

xoxoxxo
love & purrs
Abby & Mom Debra

[Ginny & The Fur Family]

I am sitting here with tears in my eyes for dear sweet Daphne - I think that she might have more time than they say. What has an x ray shown? A gland can get infected and turn hard like a tumor and in fact it is just an infected ear gland - my Charlotte cat who is about 150 in people years has been treated for a groath inside her ear for about 2 years -I use the antiboitic drops and all kinds of ear washes and stil it runs, but she has as great appitite and purrs up a storm when she is petted. Prayers for Daphne to live a long time and not be in pain -maybe the shot will help a lot. let's all pray for her to get better and not get to where she can't breathe - all prayers together are much stronger. Synergy - she deserves to be loved until the end and Chrystal loves her and treasurers her little life. God Bless Daphne and all - Ginny & The Fur Family

[LP]

Well Daffy Doodles,sweet, little koala bear kitty...you found love and you will be surrounded by it until the day you must leave.We are sorry, more than words could ever express , that you had to go through so much pain and heart-ache here on earth but we are terribly happy that you had Chrystal who loved you/loves you and watched over you with tenderness.
Chrystal, we are sending you hugs and courage and love.Go gently Daphne.Go peacefully.Go knowing you are loved.

the critters in The Cottage + Sophie XO

[Cat's Cats]

Chrystal I am so saddened by this news however I know that Daphne's short life with you was infinitely better than anything she would have known on the streets. She has been loved and cared for and when it is time for her to shuffle off this mortal coil you won't let her suffer and she will be in held in your tender hands. Please give her a cuddle and kiss from me and tell her that we love her.

[ML & The Sherwood Bunch]

Daphne has known true love and given true love back to you in return.
Whatever happens, nothing will ever change that.
Love,
ML & KC

[Lee County Clowder]

Oh, we are so sorry. Sending comforting purrrrrayers to you all.

[Sweet Purrfections]

We agree that having some quality time with Daphne is important. We're purring for both of you.

[Forty Paws]

We are so sorry to hear that Daphne has a tumor. Take care of her in the time you have left and let her know how much you care about her and love her. Many hugs and purrs and purrayers are coming to you from all of us.

Luf, Us and Maw

[Laura and Taffy]

We are so sorry about little Daphne. We are sending comforting purrs to you both. We hope that she will be comfortable for the time she has left and continue to soak in all the love that you give her. You gave her a good life; made a difference in her world, she loves you and knows you love her.

Hugs and sweet purrs,

Laura and Taffy

[Mark's Mews]

Our best purrs for both of you...

[Ginny & The Fur Family]

love is forever- even after they have gone over the rainbow bridge -Daphne has known love and will carry that love to the other side - love is a force to be recognized. Love can move mountains - maybe love can halt the growth for a while. We love you Daphne - we do not want you to go yet and we do not want you to suffer. God bless you dear Daphne - we at Fur a Way Land are thinking of you with love. Ginny & The Fur Family

[karen, pixel and samba]

OH No. I read the posts about her and although I am in no place to have another cat she is just beautiful and I always wanted the best for her. I pray she does not suffer

[Everycat]

Chrystal, we are so sorry to read the news about sweetheart Daphne. FiV tumours of the neck and head are just the pits. Daphne is lucky to have found you, a wonderful caring person who loves her unconditionally and will go the extra mile to make sure that the time she has left is full of love. Chrystal and Daphne, we send you love and rumbly purrs. You are both beautiful souls.

Oliver, Gerry & the Apes xx

[Eric and Flynn]

We are so sorry to hear this sad news about Daphne. She knows that she is very much loved and returns that love to you. Her last days will be filled with more love, which she would never have known if she hadn't been with you. Our thoughts are with you and with her.